got beer?

[monet2u]

http://www.firebox.com/product/1388?itc ... src_id=149

[sam]

It is pretty awesome. I remember a guy in college had rigged an colostomy bag for the same purpose. Obviously, the Camelback was pretty uncommon and expensive at the time.

[Irock]

On plce that women have a clear advantage over men: sneaking things into places. A big purse can be a great thing.

[monet2u]

my tried and true method... wear bike shorts under your skirt and shove a booze filled flask down the front of your shorts. works everytime...because they NEVER search a lady below the waist.

mmmm frozen raspberry vodka frozen lemonade slushies at coachella.


also if you're going to a place that allows food or a small cooler...place vodka (clear booze) in a double ziplock bag, at the bottom and your ice on top. works everytime!

[James]

My freshman year in the TCU marching band, a few of us bought these calfskin pouches that fit very neatly inside a pocket in the uniforms. The pouch had a little hose similar to that beer belly, but obviously the whole thing was much smaller. We filled them every week with Jack Daniels. When we would get to the game, we got cokes and stuff for free, so all of a sudden, the cokes became Jack & Cokes...so by the end of every game, we were blitzed and probably on our way to a party after that.

Also, it's probably the reason I can't drink whiskey anymore...esp after the riotous trip to Texas A&M, where we had to be escorted out of the stadium by their Army Corp to keep from getting beat up, but that's another story...

[ifihadahifi]

but that's another story...

A story for which I'm willing to make time.

Please, continue.

[James]

but that's another story...

A story for which I'm willing to make time.

Please, continue.

OK, you asked for it.

Novemberish, 1992, College Station, TX

Let me fill you in on the times. Back in 1992, there were a few differences in College Football in Texas. For starters, the Southwest Conference was still in existence, so all of the major in-state Universities were playing each other every year. Also, in those days, Texas A&M was the reigning champ, year in and year out. This was before they were caught cheating and then football players decided it wasn't worth going to that backwater shithole if they wasn't gettin' paid. I don't know how many NFL players came out of those teams but it was a lot. Now, at the same time, TCU was entering the Pat Sullivan era, aka "Up the middle, up the middle, up the middle, punt". Although history shows he was quite the recruiter, he couldn't coach Pop Warner if he wanted to...but at this time, he was playing with what was left of the Wacker years...so not much.. It was a transition year. And TCU sucked.

The A&M game was the last game of the year, and after A&M wrapped up their crown, and TCU limped into the offseason (which surprisingly, included a win over UT), there was a span of two weeks where the band wouldn't be making the trip. And the band was fine with that. Classes were getting tougher and finals were looming; the last thing we wanted was to spend a day watching our team getting thrown around like groupies on a Led Zeppelin bus.

But then something stupid happened.

ABC decided to televise the game. And the big wigs at ol' TCU decided to send the band anyway. So we had a 3.5 hour drive on a really crappy dismal day to a crappy dismal shithole (as described earlier) to watch..yes...I've said it already.

Now, also, the TCU band in general had a reputation. Not a good one either. We were rude, brash, had no problem getting into scuffles with the locals. It was probably fuelled by the booze, who knows, but we always seemed to take it just a bit too far. It was well known.

So, we show up to this game in our moldy panchos because it was raining like mad, miserable, and as stated, it was just useless being there. Led Zeppelin were in full party mode and TCU became the ultimate whore, getting gangbanged all over the field. All of the A&M people swaing back and forth like they were at a tent revival and the booze on our end just brought out the worst in us. Before halftime, we started getting louder and louder....calling them "Faggies", motioning the "Gig 'Em" sign toward our anuses, etc...returning retorts of "wait and watch a real band" with "they've been marching the same show for 100 years", and "they can borrow my tuner if they want" (they couldn't play in tune for shit back then). Those were the nice ones...a lot of them were personal attacks on specific hecklers...pulling the TCU snobbery out "well, you go to a state school", etc.

But it all went to hell at halftime. Me and a few others were really drunk by then, mouthing off to anyone and everyone. Their corp members that were around were laughing as we made fun of them. So we march our show....and I have to say the crowd was enjoying it. We got quite a bit of applause. We ended the show with "Birdland" which has always been a marching band favourite. At the end of "Birdland" there's an improv trumpet solo for a few bars, played by a guy named Trent. Usually he palyed something really jazzy and high, which was a pinnacle of the show, and everyone, inlcuding myself, was expecting that.

Instead, he played the A&M Fight Song. In Minor. And badly out of tune.

I've rarely heard anything as loud as the reign of boos that came down. All we could do was laugh. Even the band director, who wanted to be mad, just couldn't be. We got off the field as soon as wel could and back into the stands, suddenly surrounded by Army Corp. Not to do anything to us. But to protect us. From the fans. Things started getting thrown at us; I got something I presume was an M&M bounce off my head at blazing speed. A&M fans were getting chucked out left and right, and all we were doing was fuelling the fire. The corp guys enjoyed it as well, so that didn't help. Because we just kept going. As the game was coming to an end, we were instructed to have all of our stuff together and as the game ended, we practically ran, again escorted by their corp, to our buses. Many hand gestures followed from our buses to the fans outside and such...and as we pulled out of that backwater shithole, all we could do was laugh. The overriding these was "well, the TCU big wigs got what they asked for. The amount of complaints to the Chancellors office from A&M patrons regarding the behaviour of the TCU band, I believe, is still the record.

As this was being told to the band, in an attempt to make us feel bad, I quipped, within earshot of everyone

"I'm just surprised they can write".